Another Dress Up Bonding

Sisterly Inlove

(left to right) Ysan Garcia, Alexis Camato, I, and Pat yap. Dressing up for fun. A photo taken while shooting the "Call me maybe" video.

The New Start

Level Up

As of today, yes! I am claiming this day and announcing the official start of my more improve writing skills and blogging habit to a new level. ;) from now on, expect more of "As told by Dea" and lots of my favorite stuffs doing everyday of my life. There would sure be more smiles and laugh for all. The new dea enters the world of maturity. And everything will be clean and more organize. This time, everything will fall under the positive life. Hope you would enjoy! :) Here is my other blogs :) inyourarmsillstay.tumblr.com http://whispersbydeaf.wordpress.com

Your the Addict and I'm the Crazy...

Its the new kind of love to one person like me. Then I have found one out of no where... it just suddenly came in me when that person found me broken and lonely and tried to fix me...

lovers usually starts in simple friendship that when it goes deeper and deeper... Everyone is on the hooke... I know it really insane of me... this was the time of my crazyness...

Cultured-shocked it is somehow-thats how I can described it...
It was a fast track to me and to that person... it all started to with just a simple one... and turned to a something I and other people would thought of it...

As I could remember, its all my first time to experienced such a matter of love..
i never thought that I would fall for a person like _ _ _...

~~matter of care. it is a forbidden love.

Hoping You Back...

<3...<3>

Once you've lost something, its hard to have it back... We all have events where we have encountered things that is not to meant and meant to be lost...

How stupid of me, hoping much to have you back, when I knew it already that you have found a new one to replace a girl like me. I hate myself for acting this way. but what can I do? this is me, there's nothing I can about it.

Its hard to pretend when you can't actually hide it. its annoying much to me, every time I do remember the moments I'm with you and the times that we usually spend time even though we are far away to each other.

now, I don't understand what I really feel. But it really hurts me, knowing you're over with us.

Behind All The Laughs

This blog is something what I really feel since then...<br>

I felt this since I met lots of new people and let them be my friends... It is something I really hide since when I was a little girl... But... Actually, this starts even the time I don't know lots of people yet. I can't explain it well, but this feeling is something different from the usual stuff I do feel...

It was a feeling that no one can explain, and no one can really understand... Even I can't understand it. This is something so called "mixed emotion" and "pretending faces"-which somehow other people would called it "poker face" now a days... As a term... I was confused by it... so until now, I still don't know what to do and I can't even say it or share it to some of my friends. Even to my own sister and bestfriend, I can't say it nor share it. I don't know why, but its really making me nothing and stupid. It even makes me crazy as days goes by.

As I grow, I learned to write what I feel. And now, I'm so over to the so called "journal/dairy". Thats why I no longer have those. I more feel like blogging it. (sigh)

I don't know how to express this feeling I have, for I'm so confused. I don't know what to do anymore. But, its bugging me so much that I got so stupid and did something which isn't right. People got to see me so happy, and glad and all that. But what they didn't know is that everything is just being to well hidden by me. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to react nicely anymore.

I maybe look so different that seems to be pretty much in good condition. But the truth and what they don't know is that I'm in the opposite of it. I'm not the person people do expect much to say, but I'm a person that has this personality that you wouldn't able to know without talking to me or knowing ofcourse.

I actually don't really know what to blog. But there's no way for me to escape this. I tried so many things and still... Things don't fall to its right place and things can't change to what it should be. And now, all left to me is to try and try to figured it out. Myself... When Everything is Behind All the laughs as like a Broken String... (sigh)

Hope that I would know it as soon as posible, before I would finally break down again... :( I'm so sorry that these blog is so stupid and nothing... haha... just laugh when you don't what to do for all, cause... behind all the laughs... has the truths that is too well to be hidden...